Christmas break has been a wonderful time for me. I feel more relaxed and rejuvenated than I have in a very long time. I set some goals for over break and I have already completed a lot of those goals... and I still have about two weeks left!

First of all, we got to spend a week with family. That was a wonderful time. We spent the first several days with mine then journeyed over to Stillwater and spent time with Tyler's family. We got to see pretty much everyone we wanted and had great quality time with both families. I got to spend time holding my new niece, Bynlee, which was definitely a very important part. I have no idea how much longer we will be living close to my family so I have to take as much time as possible to make sure my nieces don't forget me =)!

After we came back from Oklahoma (which I was ready to do.. mostly to sleep in my own bed! Being away is nice, but I am glad that there's always a time to come back!) I did something that I have been wanting to do since August, but due to my deep committment to school, it was put off. I tackled our second bedroom. By the time I was working on it, we could barely walk in it. I am typically a very tidy person when it comes to how I keep our house, but this room became the "miscellaneous" room in which we put anything and everything we couldn't find a place for... not to mention half of Tyler's clothes are in the closet in that room, making that whole room a closet for him. I am pleased to say we can walk in there now! It is SO clean and SO organized. I have a box of things that I plan to get rid of, not to mention some clothes to get rid of.

One of our Christmas presents is a beautiful bookcase that Tyler's dad built for us. Boy do we need a big one! Ozark has the tendency to load couples with hundreds of books by the time graduation comes. So I got to move our two small book shelves downstairs and am now using them for decorative and storage purposes. This is great because our house is much more decorated than before. It feels a lot more like our home. It only took me 6 months to get it how I like it =). But this also means we have plenty of room in our second bedroom for our new bookcase which will hopefully come soon! It's so nice to have accomplished that. Especially because the next time I will need that room will probably be to be packing everything up. It's nice to know it will be neat and organized whenever I have to pack all of our stuff up.

Cleaning out that bedroom and making the downstairs of our townhouse more "homey" was a big goal of mine... I am very glad I accomplished this!

I also got a new book for Christmas (which it took me all of 2 days to read... now what?). It's called The Hunger Games. I have heard about it for awhile now, just about how great it is. And it truly was! It was definitely a good fiction choice for my break. I have the next two books on order through my workplace. But now I need to read some more non-fiction. That's the part that has not happened yet.

Needless to say it has been a good break. I have desperately needed a break after being in school non stop since January 2010. I know that even Tyler notices how much less stress there is in my life and how much that helps us. It's not that anything was wrong, but there's just a freedom and joy found in a stress-free time that can easily go missing in a stress-filled time. Next semester goal: not lose that freedom and joy even though I know I will be stressed. I can do it!

Happy New Year!

Finally Done!

I have been waiting for this semester to finish as soon as I got each syllabus in August. It's been a very hard but very rewarding semester. I have written too many papers, but I have also learned a lot. This set of classes is probably the set I've enjoyed most during my time at OCC. Each class has been extremely helpful to me in many different realms. I am so thankful for it, but I am even more thankful that it is over!

This Christmas break should be very relaxing. My job does not employ students over break which is a curse and a blessing. It will be interesting to live with only one income for a month, but who am I kidding... I really don't make that much to put an actual dent in anything. God has also been blessing me with plenty of babysitting opportunities... Which to me is such a great thing. The families I get to babysit for are very generous and have wonderful kids. So hopefully God will continue to provide those opportunities over break. A little income would probably be good!

During this break I will be focusing on getting ready for next semester. No, I don't mean reading lots of books for next semester's classes, or studying ahead of time. It will be a focus on rest and rejuvenation. Like I said, this past semester was hard. Next semester I am taking a few more hours and will have about the same level of time and energy invested as they are pretty time consuming classes. So while I am on break I will be reading books for fun... and I don't mean fiction books (although I am sure there will be some of that). I want to read a lot of different psychology books. I think I have general ideas of what I am interested in so I hope that reading some of these books will help me discover more of what I am passionate about. I will also be completing some projects around the house (like cleaning the second bedroom which has been abandon since August) and hopefully getting rid of some useless stuff that I didn't have the heart to get rid of sooner.. Oh and I really need to finish wedding thank you's! For awhile I got kind of frustrated that I didn't finish them this summer, but then I remembered: I took summer school. I have been in school since last January. Only a week or two break here and there. So this month long break from school is MUCH needed! So if I haven't thanked you yet for the wedding gift you bestowed upon us- don't worry, it's coming! So that's another project.

Oh and don't worry, I will also be spending some much needed relaxing time with my husband. Again, I have been in school non stop since we got married so I am looking forward to having time when we don't have to spend it together working on my homework =)!

The moment I finished my last final yesterday I felt a weight (which was REALLY heavy by the way!) lift from my shoulders immediately... and to think, I will be completely done in May. That is a feeling I cannot fathom!

A Thankful Thought

When I was in high school I did not enjoy school. As most high school students, I thought school was kind of useless in some areas. (For me, math and science especially) Since the 8th grade I knew where I wanted to attend college and I knew I did not need these subjects for my time there, but simply needed them to graduate high school. Let's just say that in high school- school was not my thing.

Over the past week or so I have been dwelling on my thankfulness for education. When I was in Cambodia I learned about the chances of people getting an education in their lives. When the Khmer Rouge was in power, they wiped out 20% of the population of Cambodia... Starting with anyone who was educated. It's true, they targeted educated people. Now, 30 years later, the country is in shambles. A generation of uneducated people is in power now. Not to say it isn't getting better, but it's just a terrible thing that an educated person was a bad person-worthy of death. Anyway, a large number of children in Cambodia will not ever get an education, not just a higher education. But you can bet that those who go on to higher education are few and far between.

Now, I know we live in a different place and our country has not seen the same problems they have. But I am very thankful for an education. Not just high school, but more so, for my college education. Since about the 8th grade I dreamed of the day I would move to Ozark Christian College in the thriving metropolis of Joplin, Missouri. Let's just say the journey has gone different than I ever anticipated, but in some ways, it has been everything I hoped it would be.

One of the reasons I am thankful for the education I have received at OCC is because it has honestly allowed me to enjoy school. I get to study things that pertain exactly to what I want to do with my life. This has allowed me to look forward to going to class each day and write a countless numbers of papers, study some intense memory work, and take tests with a zeal I have never had for school before. The knowledge I have gained while at Ozark is irreplaceable. I am forever thankful that Ozark has instilled in me the idea that school can actually be enjoyable!

I feel like the luckiest girl in the world to be able to learn about my area of interest under the most Godly set of professors I could have ever asked for. One of the things I always tell people when they are considering Ozark or want to know what I love about OCC is this: This is your family. It's no longer professor-student relationships, it's like every professor becomes your mentor. These are the people you will look up to and what to be like whether or not you agree with all of their thoughts and ideas. These are people you don't just learn from concerning the Word of God, or in my case, Psychology and Counseling. These are the people you learn from for four years concerning the life you lead and how to be the person God intends for you to be. I would have never developed into this version of me had I chosen to go somewhere else, at least not in my four years of college. As I approach the end of my second to last semester, my heart is filled with the sorrow you feel when you are about to move from your home. I could never express my thankfulness to the faculty and staff at OCC for pouring in to my life for four years... and some of them, I know it will continue in the years to come. Choosing Ozark was easily one of the most important decisions I have ever made. The people I have known from my time there have been by me through incredibly important and trying times. I will forever be thankful for my OCC family.

Just the two of us

1. What are your middle names? Gwen and Evans

2. How long have you been together? On December 8th it will be three years total, but we have been married for 5 1/2 months!

3. How long did you know each other before you started dating? About 4 1/2 years. 

4. Who asked who out? He asked me out.

5. How old are each of you? I am 21 and Tyler is 22

6. Did you go to the same school? We went to the same college, but different high schools.

7. Are you from the same home town? Nope, Tyler is from Stillwater, OK and I am from Owasso, OK... just about an hour apart.

8. Who is the smartest? Tyler. He is extremely smart. 

9. Who majored in what? I will graduate in May with my Bachelor of Christian Ministry: Psychology and Counseling and Tyler has a Bachelor's of Christian Ministry: Student Ministry and another BCM: Church Planting.

10. Who is the most sensitive? There is no question that that is me!

11. Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple? Umm probably Cancun. But I throw in a picture from NYC too since that's kinda far!

12. Who has the worst temper? Definitely me. I don't think Tyler knows how to get upset about anything. Okay thats not true, but it's a very rare occasion that he is actually upset.

13. How many children do you want? 2-3. But who knows. That could all change once I actually experience the whole having a child thing. 

14. Who does the cooking? I do most of it, but Tyler is a really good cook. I just really like to do it. But he helps when I ask, and he always does the grilling.

15. Who is more social? Definitely Tyler. I am very much an introvert. Sitting at home with Tyler is perfectly fine with me, but he definitely needs more social interaction than I do.

16. Who is the neat freak? Definitely me. Tyler's not super messy but the mess doesn't bother him.

17. Who is the most stubborn? We are both stubborn. But I might be a little more so.

18. Who wakes up earlier? Right now we both wake up at the same time. But that will change next semester.

19. Where was your first date? Olive Garden and then this Christmas Light extravaganza thing in Carthage, MO. 

20. Who has the bigger family? Mine is bigger. (I have three siblings, Tyler has one)
21. Do you get flowers often? Well it depends on the definition of "often"

22. How do you spend the holidays? This year and last year we split them between both families. Living only an hour apart makes it easy for splitting. But who knows how we will do it in the future!

23. Who is more jealous? Neither of us

24. How long did it take to get serious? Umm well it depends, me or him? Me=I was probably serious prior to us dating... and Him=awhile =)

25. Who eats more? We both eat a lot but he probably eats more.

26. What do you do for a living? Right now I am a student and Tyler is the Interim High School Minister at College Heights Christian Church.

27. Who does the laundry? I do most of the time.

28. Who's better with the computer? Definitely Tyler! Without him I would be lost. 
29. Who drives when you are together? We split pretty evenly. It depends on whose car we take, who has more gas... Tyler doesn't love driving, and I do so we both drive a lot.

30. What is your song? Until You by Dave Barnes. We both used lyrics from this song in our gifts to each other one year for Valentine's Day... so it was pretty obvious that this was our song.

Passion

I am so thankful that God has given me a passion. It took me a bit more time to figure out what it was than what I would have liked but my timing isn't necessarily always best. I had the intention to become a teacher when I first came to Ozark, but it did not take me long to figure out I only saw that as my best option rather than truly finding something that was really me. It's really hard to figure out what you want to do in life, so I now totally understand people taking one year after high school to figure that out. I kind of did that but it was very convenient that I could stay at Ozark when I finally figured it out.

Through my journey at OCC God has revealed slowly through different classes that I have taken what my passion is. It was easy for me to figure out that Psychology and Counseling is where my heart is, but I'm still not even sure where that is leading me. But I am thankful for God slowly showing me different areas that I am passionate about. I don't necessarily think that these passions are going to lead me to huge careers full of money and successful things on worldly standards. I think that God has been teaching me that where he is leading me is not necessarily going to be what people expect or even okay in the world's standards. But I believe he has set my heart in the right place. As cliche as it may sound: my passion is helping people.

Choosing to stay at Ozark to pursue my bachelor's is a risky thing. I struggle with this risk on a weekly basis. I can't go anywhere I want to grad school... There is a specific list of places I could possibly get in to. But there's no telling if I will even end up close to those places. This is why it is a risk. It's risky because this path may not lead me to some high paying, or paid at all, job. But God has laid it on my heart that he is going to take care of us if I will honor him by pursuing his will for my life. I am okay with this, but I keep running in to people who are not. I understand the use of financial security- I really do. I understand that it is important. But I can't deny God's calling, I am sure of his calling on my life and  of the fact that if I am honoring God's will that he provide and he will take care of me. I am his child no matter what. 

My struggle is rooted in the fact that audible voices can be more easily heard than the voice from my Father. But if I am constantly pursuing his voice over this world my heart will remain in his plan.

Productivity

Life has been very productive lately. I have a huge mound of assignments coming up in the next several weeks... which usually stresses me out to the max (at least that is the story of this semester). But last week I made a decision: I am not going to let myself get so stressed out that I actually have emotional breakdowns. Yes. I have had some extreme emotions going on this semester. When I get stressed out, these emotions are magnified. It's hard for me to handle being a wife, a student, a volunteer, and worker. I've even had to cut out my second place of volunteering which is extremely sad. I had several weeks that I was stuck in a rut of complete stress. But I decided that was not going to be the case for the rest of my semester. It's senior year and I am going to learn and enjoy while I am still fortunate enough to be a student at Bible college.

So I decided to get ahead. And I have. I have spent almost every day of the last several days in the library just getting stuff done- even stuff I can do at home. But I know that my productivity is way less when I am at home and there are messes to be cleaned, yummy treats to be baked, and Ellen Degeneres to watch. I have gotten so much done. But there is still much to do considering I have two research papers due in the next two weeks!

One of my biggest issues is wanting to do it all myself. I want to take great care of Tyler and make his life so much easier and show my love through all of my actions. But the problem is... my life is a bit more packed than his. Not to say he doesn't do anything because trust me, ministry is like a job that never sleeps. But I try to cook all of the meals, keep the house tidy, do homework (which this semester feels like I am doing a years worth of homework), work my low 12 hours a week, but volunteer with the youth group several times a week. I just want to be the woman who does it all! I know Tyler appreciates this attitude but I also know he would be so gracious to help me if I would just ask him. I am getting a bit better and practicing sharing the load. I have always been the kind of girl to take the loads all to myself and not let others share in my stress. But I think that needs to change.

I have been meeting with a couple of my good friends (well, we have only met twice), but I can already tell you how happy I am that I sought some accountability in my life. My relationships have changed dramatically in the past several months. Many transitions happening that cause this. I think transitions are healthy... and I am thankful for it because I think that where I am now and the relationships that I am in now are a lot healthier than I have been in the past. I have had inklings that I need more accountability and more time to just share life with other women and I am so glad I finally made the step to do this.

Needless to say, my last few weeks have been more productive than usual on several levels. Mostly on levels that will reduce my stress and anxiety that I deal with on a regular basis. Life is a lot better when you take the necessary steps to be a healthy individual. It is my goal to become healthier emotionally and mentally this year.

P.S. On a very exciting note- I pre-enrolled for my last semester of college this week! Eek! I had a mere 12 hours I need in order to graduate... so I threw in an extra elective which means I am going to New York for 6 days in March! Hooray!

I feel like I can breathe now. My first exegetical of the semester is done. This, my friends, is an important thing. It has been several semesters since I wrote my first exegetical and my only exegetical prior to this. Apparently I saved all of my exegetical classes for senior year. Hm.. possibly a terrible decision. I have one more exegetical for this semester, and two research papers. Christmas Break can not come soon enough!!

This has been an interesting week. I went home last weekend, which was wonderful. I decided to extend my visit from Saturday night to Sunday afternoon and I am glad I did. It made for a crazy Sunday but what can I say, I missed my family! My dear friend Emily, who is a great blessing to me in this time of my life, went along with me. I thoroughly enjoyed that!

I am going back home tonight. My friend Lacy lost her mom this week to cancer. I cannot even express the amount that Lacy has seen in this life. Sometimes when I see others struggle through so much more than I ever had, I have no way of understanding how they keep going. But she just does. She is truly great. I really think that they moved here for a reason. When her father was diagnosed with cancer we spent much time encouraging one another, as both of our fathers had now gone through a serious health crisis. I will forever be thankful for her encouragement in my life. And now, I know, it's my turn to encourage her some more. Her mom was a very special woman. I wouldn't miss celebrating Lori's life for anything!

I am working on pictures for the blog of my home! But as you might guess, it's even harder to get everything together when I have school looming over me!

I hope you have a blessed day!