Not what I expected...

Sometimes people ask me if I am learning a lot about Tyler or if being married to him/living with him is really different than I expected. I'm just going to be honest, Tyler and I knew each other extremely well prior to getting married... not to say that I knew everything about him, I am sure there are a thousand more things to learn. But really, we knew each other pretty well. We have been friends for 7 1/2 years, really close friends for at least four years. Tyler lived in this apartment for a year before we got married and since I spent some time here, I already learned a lot of his weird habits as far as living arrangements. I haven't run into a lot of surprises yet.. well, at least not in him.

But me. I am not what I expected. Not in the least bit. Did I know how to cook more than two meals prior to getting married? No. Did I anticipate being very prompt when it comes to dishes and cleaning? No. Did I enjoy doing laundry? No. Why isn't being a wife a paid position? I mean, I love being his wife and doing things around the house, but sometimes that is all I want to do. It's super fun. This is what is surprising to me. All of the sudden, I love keeping this place in order, planning our weekly menu, grocery shopping, doing laundry. I feel like I have to clean the kitchen at least once a day, but I love it! I am kind of weirding myself out.

I do learn much about Tyler... and let me tell ya, living with him is awesome! He is a very entertaining husband. More than anything I am surprised how just living with him and being married to him makes so much more of my life about him. I want to make sure things are great around here for him (even though I have about a billion other things I should probably be doing...). I love doing this, if only it could be a full time job.

I just thought I'd share about how I surprise myself on a daily basis. Now it's time to pick up the bedroom. Have a happy Saturday!

It Has Begun

What has begun, you might ask?
Several things really:

Football season.
I don't really enjoy football season. But this season is different. Why? Because when I lived at OCC I could avoid football season very easily. I simply didn't have the opportunity to watch it due to no cable in my room. This year though... I live with a BOY. You know what that means. Any football on TV? We're watching it. Don't you worry. So today, to avoid the football that took over the TV, I cleaned... and I mean cleaned. It was nice. Tyler is nice though. He knows how I dislike watching every single game that comes on. He's willing to compromise... this is good news for me. I don't mind watching teams that we care about. But if it's a team I have no attachment to or interest in, why watch? That's something I'll never understand.

My desire for short hair.
Just as Tyler will never understand my need for short hair. Yes, I said need. The longer it gets, the harder it is to work with. I know this is not a serious issue, but I am okay with blogging about my hair. It's just, it's a big deal that I grew it out for over a year. And it's really just kinda stopped growing. Sooo... don't be surprised if there is short hair in my near future!

Senior year of college.
This one is exciting. But it brings much homework. Although I am taking a small 13 hours, by far the smallest amount I have ever taken... I have more big projects than I have ever had before. I have 2 exegeticals and two research papers. That's a little much for a person who is not great at writing papers. On the bright side, I love my schedule and my classes so far... (well, besides Bible Lands and Lifeways, but that's just expected). I've got two good Bible classes and a great counseling class and counseling seminar. It's going to be a great semester!

New chapters at CHCC.
Well, We have officially survived the first couple of weeks of Tyler being Interim High School Minister. So many people are still pouring out support and encouragement left and right. I am surrounded by more uplifting and positive people than ever before. I have been reached out to by multiple women who genuinely want us to succeed during this time, not only as a couple doing ministry, but in our marriage and other relationships. I feel like I have several different groups of people pouring into my life, and this is a great thing.

Life is very well rounded right now. I've got investment at OCC and CHCC. It's a pretty great place to be. There is no telling where we will be going after I graduate, or if there will be any "going" at all. What's important is that I focus on here and now. I've seen so many people be too focused on what's next that what's here begins to be meaningless to them. But I know that God is going to much in our time in Joplin whether it's for 9 more months or 9 more years. What's next will happen when it's time. I couldn't be happier with where we are right now.

Random Life Observations

1. I don't like being away from Tyler. I like being in Owasso, but I really like Tyler too. Hm. It's sad.

2. My hair has not been this long since 9th grade. That was around 6-7 years ago... I am not used to this. And I just want short hair that doesn't end up in a ponytail at the end of every day... Okay. But ask me tomorrow and I will probably tell you I love long hair.

3. My niece is more than hilarious. She's just so precious. Today she was saying "buh-bye" (she was pretending to go to church) and she decided that she didn't want to hug, but she should shake our hands. So she went from grandma to grandpa to aunt Abigail shaking hands and saying "buh-bye". Oh goodness.

4. It's amazing how many times I have been asked if I am pregnant in the last two months. Not because I look pregnant, simply because I am married now. The answer is NO and no time soon thank you very much. Lydia is taking care of the need for a baby to be on the way.

5. I really like being married to Tyler. It's great!! But it's awkward when people say "how is married life" because I say "Great!!" and then don't really know what to say... And I think that people expect me to gush on and on and I don't really know where to start.

6. I wish Tyler and I could work part-time forever and make enough money... It's really great how much time we get to spend together. But I guess that has to end sometime...

Okay. I think those are all of my observations right now!

Moving Forward

Life is certainly changing!

The past month has been filled with a change we certainly weren't expecting. Our very dear friends and mentors (not to mention the high school minister being Tyler's boss), sat us down to tell us that he would be resigning this summer. Mind you, this happened about a week or maybe two after we got back from Mexico.

It's been an emotional and tiring, but exciting month as we prepared to move forward in this ministry. We have sat through several moments of tears while Beau and Michelle continued to announce this to so many people who love them. The reason why they leave is so filled with God's provision. It's nothing short of God's will for their lives. While we are deeply sad to no longer have the chance to do ministry with them, we are so excited as they get to move on to fulfill a passion in their hearts.

We have not been able to speak about this until last Sunday night when Beau finally told our students. It was incredibly emotional. Waiting for them to go public was like waiting for it to become real. Well now it's real.

I was greatly blessed and encouraged by many women the night that it became public knowledge. I will never forget looking up from the final prayer and instantly being surrounded and prayed for. For the time being, Tyler will be serving as Interim High School Minister at College Heights Christian Church. Until they hire someone to take the job full time, he will be filling this role. I have so much confidence in him! He has done an outstanding job and we know that the leadership at CHCC wouldn't have asked him to step in if they didn't have the confidence in him as well.

It's a scary thing to be pushed forward into a position that was not expected. But over the past month I have been encouraged and lifted up like never before. As people have said their love for Beau and Michelle, they have also filled our hearts with so much confidence and support and prayers. I couldn't be happier about the church that we are transitioning with. We can only hope that they will let us "grow up" here like Beau and Michelle did.

So any prayers offered would be greatly appreciated. It's a little more responsibility than we planned on, but we know it's the right thing for right now.

Faithfulness

It's hard to remain silent when I am so full of words and emotion right now. It's hard to remain in the US when my heart is full of love and longing for another country. It's hard to remain still when I just need to move.

Today I needed a bit of a reminder of God's faithfulness. Well, I don't know if it's a reminder, but more of some comfort regarding his faithfulness. It's a concept I know to be true, but a concept that requires direct action from me.

First of all, I love my Life Application Study Bible. I suggest you get one too.

The very first passage I found regarding God's faithfulness in the Bible was in Deuteronomy. (Deuteronomy 7:9) Ya know the first thing that this passage told me? God keeps his covenant with those who keep his commands. This frustrated me from the moment I read it.

A year ago, while sponsoring my first high school camp, I received a loud and confident "no" when I began to ask God if I could go back to Cambodia this coming summer. Granted it was also around that time that it became clear that getting married this summer was a big possibility. I knew that while I could not go to Cambodia, I could begin a different journey. I am thankful that I got married this summer, but my heart still aches for Cambodia. I have obeyed this command of his to not return this summer. I understand it and I am okay with it. But now it's time to start asking about when I can go back. But this is what I learned in my study of how God is faithful.

I read so many times how God is faithful to those who keep his commands... and those who obey his words. But there's never a time frame included. The writers of the inspired Word of God never say "he will remain faithful to you by granting your wish in the next 1-2 years". Nope. Nothing like that. It's all, remain faithful and he will remain faithful. That's why this is so hard. What if it's not for another ten years? What if I really don't ever get to go back? I know that sometimes God has greater things in mind, but the invisible possibility of something greater is clouded by my view of something that is already great.

All through the Psalms I read about how he is faithful and just and true to his promises. Finally in the New Testament I read about a couple of important things to remember. First, he will strengthen and protect me. ( 2 Thessalonians 3:3) While I wait in silence on this pressing issue in my life, he will strengthen me. He will protect me. While it's just silence, I know that he doesn't hear silence because he can hear my heart. It's comforting to know that he is hearing me and understanding me. Another thing is that when I suffer, I need to commit myself to my faithful creator. (1 Peter 4:19) All I can do while my heart is aching to go back is commit to faithfulness. Because he is faithful in all of his promises. (Psalm 145:13)

It isn't easy to wait for something like this. But I find much comfort in knowing that he has been faithful through all generations. (Psalm 100:5) He has not forgotten about me and the desires of my heart, especially the desires to serve and love the people of Cambodia. I pray that his faithfulness is clear to you today.

Life

Life is really good. It's really different, but in almost all ways. I guess I will just fill you in on all of the things that take up a normal week of my life.

#1: Youth. I love our youth group, I really really do! They are a fantastic group of kids. There are so many lessons to learn when leading high school students. Trust me, I am learning them. But I am loving it! I have successfully seen my d-group a couple of times which is fantastic as well. They are such a wonderful group of girls. I am so thankful that I get to be in their lives. As the days go on I really feel like they want me to be in their lives. This is great because I have much to give!

#2: Work. So, I have the best job ever! Unfortunately it will only last for a few more weeks. I get to watch two adorable boys all day long two days a week. It pays the bills and I get to play with some awesome kids. Not to mention randomly filling in at the bookstore and babysitting for another wonderful family. I really do love it. I miss my bookstore job though. I look forward to returning in the fall. I have been so blessed. I haven't had a job in about two years that I dreaded going to. I am so thankful for low-stress and fun jobs.

#3: Summer school. It is almost over though! By Friday, I will be done! It's so very exciting. I can't even explain how ready I am to be done with it. I am so thankful I was able to finish 6 more hours of school in just 2 months. One class was only 4 weeks long which is awesome! They have been really good classes, but I am ready for my 3 week summer vacation =)!

#4: Tyler! It's quite crazy how much time we spend together. I guess that's the perk of both of us only working part time. (Although, I am sure you can imagine what the negatives are to that!) We have a nice system of how both of us being part time works and it's working. I love how much time we get to spend together. I can't even imagine both of us working full time. I feel like we will never see each other then! I love it though. Being married is great. We have had such a great summer. I am really glad we got married early in the summer so we could have some time to get used to things and enjoy before school starts. He is a really great husband!

Anyway, that's an update of my life. I am sure there will be more in the next couple of weeks as I have more time, no summer school, and maybe a little more energy!

The Future

I don't know what my future holds. This fact usually scares me, makes me uncomfortable, and even makes me mad. I like to know what's happening, when it's happening, why it's happening, and how it's happening. But I don't know that right now. And for once, I am really glad.

I think it's a common mistake to get so caught up in what is next. This is something I try to keep myself from. I try really hard because I am the first one to worry about the future. But right now I am at complete peace with the fact that I don't know where Tyler and I will be or where we will be going in like, 10 months. I think there is a good chance we won't be staying around Joplin for too long after I graduate. But what is that mysterious destination? I don't know.

I just don't want to miss the now. I don't want to miss what God is giving me here. Joplin isn't my favorite place, but until God clearly calls me elsewhere, I will love this city with Christ's love. I don't want to leave just for the sake of getting out of here. I want to bloom here until God plants me in another place.

It's a real treat to hear me say that I am at peace with not knowing. It might be the first time those words have ever come out of my mouth (so to speak =) ). But it's true. I know God will take good care of us!